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My Brain is too full

As I read Dale Short’s column this week in the Eagle, I almost jumped off the couch and shouted Rickhallelujah!  The column was about having the feeling that his brain was full. I can name that tune in one note.

I’m afflicted by the full-brain syndrome and it’s never more evident than when I’m trying to come up with ideas for weekly columns. 

My head is so full of trivia, technical garbage and other bits of useless knowledge that navigating around inside there trying to find something fresh to write about is like swimming in a vat of cold grits.

I must have realized some time back because I unconscientiously employed some safeguards to keep my head from bursting open like a ripe melon.

For example, I have a pass-through filter that I often use when Jilda is talking to me. I can sit there and look deeply engrossed in the conversation but in reality, she might as well be talking to a stump. The details slide right through my brain as if my ear canals were sprayed with WD-40.

She could have explained in minute details what she’s planning to cook that night, and a few minutes later I’ll ask, “What’s for supper?” 

She rolls her eyes and gives me the Reader’s Digest version of what we’re having. Then when we sit down to eat, I’ll say, “Wow, we’re having roast chicken, I was hoping we’d have that.”

It’s at these times she utilizes what I’ll call, “her laser stare.”  That’s the look that says “I have friends, who would help me put you down, chop your body in little pieces, and put you in the deep freezer.”  

I tend to get a little antsy here because I know it’s true. I love her friends, but if it came down between Jilda and me, they’d bring freezer bags and gas for the chainsaw.

Another brain space saving technique I use is electronic reminders. I have all kinds of devices that beep, chirp, ring, buzz, vibrate and otherwise notify me. 

When I have something really important to remember, I’ll set up reminders on all the devices. When the appointed time comes, it sounds like noon at a grandfather clock repair shop.

I think part of the cause of the full-brain syndrome is the velocity of information that comes at us daily. 

Back in the day, you got information via the “brogan net.” 

That’s when a neighbor (usually wearing brogans) walked over to your house in the evenings, sat out on the porch, and chewed the fat. They’d discuss local gossip and other news. 

They usually headed home before the “skeeters” got too bad. Mama would often send them on their way with a few fresh tomatoes, a basket of peas, or a jar of chow-chow.

These days, not only do we have newspapers, TV, and radio all vying for brain time, but also computers and smart phones streaming news, sports and weather 24-7.

Whose brain would not get full after a while? After reading Dale’s column, I realize that I am not alone and that makes me feel better.


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